I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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