dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
How external is "for external use only"?
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
