I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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