We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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