Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize