Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
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