I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
