just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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