butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
