I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
