He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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