He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
