the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
