She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Randomize
