My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
you never un-have a 4some
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
