I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
