she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Randomize
