How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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