Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
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