if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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