You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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