JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize