You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Randomize
