my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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