the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
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