There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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