yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
