It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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