how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
