Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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