Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Randomize
