well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize