just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Randomize
