saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
North Korea, Best Korea!
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
