Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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