Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
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