Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
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