Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
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