This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
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