You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
