I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
