i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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