the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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