it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
i drank out of a bidet.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
