i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
