Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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