Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
tell me about the eggs
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
