it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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