Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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