it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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