that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
